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Joined 8 months ago
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Cake day: April 1st, 2024

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  • Why do people think poly=no boundaries?

    I know of very very few poly people who would be okay with that. And even if they were, poly requires open communication, and he did it behind her back (which we know she wasn’t okay with it because it ended their relationship). So a double whammy.

    Highly recommend the book Opening Up to understand how many different types of poly there are and what they might look like.


  • Lol this whole thread is so funny to me, as someone who regularly dates millionaires.

    Ya’ll are not a cash cow. Don’t worry, real gold diggers go after gold. You’re safe from gold diggers. That of course does not make you immune from financial abuse but that’s different than gold digging.

    Second, these dating forums are all roleplay. There’s a pretty big chance those are men role-playing as the greedy women of their stupid nightmares. No woman ever gets in proximity to a man only based on money. The idea is laughable to women. Even full service sex workers decline men and have actual correspondences with each other blacklisting men in the area to keep everyone safe. No woman ONLY cares about the money. They can’t afford to. However, men engaging with other men think like that because they don’t have to worry about the risk of violence as much. That’s why I think this is probably roleplay.

    Third, I hear men talking about their potential future wives like this all the time, including financially, if they’d date a fat girl, if they’d date a girl who doesn’t do oral, etc etc etc. Even if women are doing this, men do it too (and i bet you never called it out). Marriage is a contract that ties finances together so it matters. Personally, I’m never getting married but for those who do, it can really affect their ability to get housing or other stuff. It’s a sad feature of capitalism.

    And yes, capitalists gain a lot from this structure. They fish for sex workers in every industry, including modeling. This causes women to br traded like commodities and so the most valuable women per their standards they can eugenics into their line, will be the one they marry. A lot of men’s attraction for women is just based on how valuable she is as a human commodity. This is why “objectification” gets brought up so much.

    https://youtu.be/3n-yU_BpA4M?si=-CwuVC_45nn5vKUD

    Last, the above is the attitude of real gold diggers, which is open and frankly discussed with their actual source of gold. It is not financial abuse and to be clear financial abuse is wrong - it is instead a negotiation so that she can live at the same comfort level as him and enjoy her life. No rich man is confused about this. Most would be kinda embarrassed to not take care of her, like going to a fancy restaurant and she orders a small appetizer+water in her budget while he gets a wine tasting and a steak just makes him look bad. That’s how I know none of you are actually near this lifestyle, because you don’t innately understand this.

    Again, I am not getting married, I’m never having kids, and I’m poly; I demand these aspects specifically to bypass the interpersonal dynamic of me being treated as a commodity, and instead this forces my partners and myself to love in the moment, to actively choose each other, and to give resources freely and not coerced through a contract.




  • LustyArgonian@lemmy.worldtoAsklemmy@lemmy.mlDo you approve sex work? Why or why not?
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    3 months ago

    I think it depends by what you mean by support. I support people’s legal right to practice all forms of sex work. I think it’s silly to outlaw sex work.

    On a personal level, I think sex workers are a “final frontier” when it comes to workers’ rights and we should stand together in solidarity and demand certain standards for sex work so it can be done ethically. Things like:

    • all sex workers must be independent contractors or cooperatives. They cannot be owned by a company or third party.
    • all sex workers have the same protected privacy status as priests in terms of what they can be compelled to disclose. Everyone should have the right to sexual privacy with their kinks including the sex worker.
    • if a sex worker does want to report suspected illegal activity, they are completely protected. It is up to the worker whether they will disclose information regarding encounters (ps, you DEFINITELY want this. Sex workers hear terrifying things they cannot report for fear of repercussions).
    • it is rape to lure a sex worker into sex under false pretenses (or sexual assault/battery). Including lying about HIV sti status, lying about ability to pay, or lying about anything that would affect her ability to say yes or no to the interaction
    • all sex workers should be allowed to politely decline any client, no repercussions. Including strippers.

    ----paragraphbreak----

    I personally see people as a Dominatrix. I only see people I genuinely like. Due to the nature of people who see Dominatrixes, most of my subs are not sexual anyway, and I decide sex on my terms/comfort. I am polyamorous and very good at FemDomming, so I figured it would be a fun job at the end of the world. I get to meet a lot of people and travel, it’s pretty fun. I think if I was doing more survival work it would be different, or if I was doing full service etc. But I genuinely like every sub I take on (otherwise it’s really boring and not fun, which defeats the purpose of this job in the first place). Sex work doesn’t have to look like a hookup. Usually most people are looking for connection, even with porn and stripping.