In the middle of getting my wisdom teeth pulled. They had to like, take me off the laughing gas, but then feed me air or o2 or something for a bit to make sure it was cleared out of my system enough that I could EXIT the dentist’s office and proceed down the hall of the office tower to the shared washroom … while still doped up on the other pain stuff and whatever else was going on (I think they had to shove some gauze in there to keep me from bleeding all over myself or something) … fun times!

When I was in elementary school I entered the bathroom and some other boy was standing with his back against the wall, facing the urinals, with his pants down and his dick out. When he saw me he said, “No wait! I can make it!”

He then started to piss. He apparently was pissing as forcefully as he could, trying to “make it”. As his stream started it went all over the floor in front of him, then crept up the wall, splashing all over the pipes and the bottom of the urinal. Finally he got, at best, one drop of piss into the urinal at which point his stream retreated and he re-sprayed everything a second time.

“YEAH!” he said. “YEAH!”, in victory. Then he left.

It’s been like forty years and I still remember this. I have five memories from elementary school and this is one of them.

So this one time in my early 20s, I was at a hippie sort of festival- type thing (rainbow gathering, for anyone interested) up in the hills in Yorkshire. The toilet situation was just piss on the grass, anywhere outside of the main areas, use your common sense. For number twos, there were “shit-pits”, it’s a trench, you squat with one foot on each side, take a shit, then chuck in a handful of two of fire ash and soil to cover it, job done. There’s a beach windbreak for a bit of privacy, and the pits are a bit away from where other stuff is going on. So anyway, there I am, squatting, getting ready to answer a call of nature, when this young woman comes and squats down right in front of me, facing me. Beautiful woman, big long dreads, cute face, nose ring… I freeze up, most awkward I’ve ever been, while she maintains eye contact, squeezes one out, wipes up, and goes on her way without a word. Then I unfreeze and carry on with my day. Weird memory.

Gonna need some clarification of the word “during,” there, Boss.

Edit to add my answer, it was while my roommate was on a date.

In the early 2000s I had just come out as a transgender woman and the world was much more hostile towards trans people back then. I was hanging out with some friends in Toronto at a New Years Eve party and I had to use the washroom sooo badly but there were like hundreds of people around the entrances. It was my first time ever using a public washroom as a woman, and it couldn’t have been more public.

I ended up chickening out and peeing in an alley later out of desperation. It sucked big time.

Feeling nostalgic and drank a bottle of chocolate milk on my lunch break. Discovered I was lactose intolerant after I clocked back in. I was the only one covering the deli counter.