Microwaved pepperoni chips.

Put pepperoni on a plate with some paper towels, microwave for one minute. The apartment will smell either heavenly or sickening for the next hour, depending on how much you like pepperoni.

Works with any sliced sausage really

Mine would probably be my ghetto breakfast sandwiches. I usually throw a little shredded cheese, diced onion, and hot peppers into a coffee mug and crack and egg into it and then scramble it. Microwave that for a min while i toast an English muffin or bagel. Then put it together with maybe a thin slice of ham. Excellent breakfast sandwich. People think I’m nuts for making the eggs in a microwave, but it works well, has an easy cleanup, and is super quick in the mornings before work.

It’s bending the rules, since it’s a camping meal, but I have made it at home, too, since it makes a great depression meal. I got it from backpackers, who I’m pretty sure got it from prison inmates:

The Ramen Bomb.

Cook a crushed up packet of instant ramen noodles, maybe with a little more water than usual. Add like half a packet of instant mashed potatoes. You can also add a protein, like… chopped up Spam. Maybe some hot sauce or other fixings if you’re feeling fancy.

I hated how much I enjoyed it. Granted, that was when I was really tired and hungry, but that hit the spot.

Also, I’ve heard meals like the ones in this thread affectionately referred to as “glop,” by a fellow glop-enjoyer.

Another delicious hit - chocolate sandwiches!

Two slices of white bread, fill sandwich generously with hot chocolate mix. Deliciously dry and chocolatey.

Spaghetti Amoré (~$15 Serves 4-6)

• 16oz Box of Spaghetti
• 1lb Ground Turkey
• 1 Can Cream Of Cheddar
• 1 Can Cream of Mushroom
• 1 Can Tomato Soup
• 8oz of Shredded Mozzarella
• Spices: salt, black pepper, poultry seasoning, onion powder, garlic powder, oregano

Start boiling your pasta water, salt the water. Meanwhile, in a skillet start cooking the ground turkey till pink is gone. Once cooked, start seasoning with above spices to taste until satisfied, then move skillet to back burner on lowest setting to keep warm.

Preheat oven to 375. Once pasta water is boiling, add spaghetti and cook per instruction until al dente. Drain pasta in a colander, then return to pot.

While pot and spaghetti are still hot, add ground turkey and 3 soup cans to the pot and stir spaghetti until soups are evenly incorporated.

Dump contents of pot into a 9x13" casserole dish, spread contents evenly in the dish, then top with mozzarella cheese.

Bake in the oven till cheese has melted (about 5-10 minutes)

Remove from oven and let cool on stove for 5 minutes. Use a spatula to cut a square and serve warm.

Those sweet potatoes are close to Grandma Appalachia’s traditional preparation that she got from a recipe her Irish aunt tore out of a magazine back in the 70s, but hers included a hoppy beer to balance the hot sauce

…so i grew up with what we called five-way in northern kentucky, and no, it’s not cincinnati chili…

• spaghetti
• browned ground beef (or in my case since 1989, vegetarian substitute)
• diced onions (fresh / cold)
• dark red kidney beans (simmered / hot)
• grated cheddar cheese (annatto-colored)
• ketchup

…it’s all layered up on a large plate in that order, bottom-to-top so the cheese melts nicely, cut into a grid pattern with a fork and knife, and then mixed together: i don’t cook it often since moving out on my own thirty-five years ago but it so hits the spot when i do…

Earlier this week I had curry on nacho chips because I made some really good curry and did not have the energy to make the actual nacho accoutrements that I had planned on doing

It was great

Butter beans with olives. Cover it in oregano, some garlic, some chilli flakes, and then drizzle a tiny bit of soy sauce and plenty of olive oil over the top.

It’s dumb, but it’s so tasty, quick, and easy.

a rice cooker filled with lentils and nuts and other types of bird food. no seasoning or salt. brown rice.

a smoothie with raw kale/spinnach, broccoli, spirulina, a banana, almond milk. looks dark green.

actually, ive changed my mind. i would try to get someone to eat this.

I make a meaty spaghetti sauce with various spices, but I cook the ground beef in the pan at a low simmer for about 2hrs before I even add the tomato sauce, in order for those spices to penetrate the meat.

I call it a nuclear time bomb because it tastes totally normal - very delicious, even - but about 10-15 minutes in, you are reaching for a hand towel to wipe away the sweat which is quite literally dripping off of you. And you have felt NONE of the hot spices on your tongue.

A much quicker dish involves Cæsar dressing, which I add copious amounts of garlic powder to (4-5 tablespoons), then prevent the dressing from solidifying by adding lemon juice, then wrapping up with freshly ground garlic. As in, a paste, *not chopped or minced._ For a salad using a single head of Romaine, the paste alone uses 15-30 garlic cloves depending on size. And this is on top of the garlic powder. Tastes amazing, but it can get garlicky enough to be barely edible. Think the same kind of burn when chewing down on a fresh raw clove. I sometimes get an “addictive overwhelming thirst” for this garlicky dish that has me gorging on it almost exclusively for an entire week.

My invented dish I call “Scrumpy”. You take fries or fried potatoes, equal amount lettuce broken up like for a salad, chicken, then top it with chicken or beef gravy and chopped green onions. To really take up the indulgence level you can add southern hot sauce like Frank’s, and some Cajun seasoning.

It started because of my great love of poutine, and wondering how I could make it into a healthier full meal. I’ve done a million variations on it, too. Stir fried cabbage and onion instead of lettuce. Corned beef instead of chicken. Adding a fried egg on top… Very flexible weeknight meal.

I would absolutely serve this to someone if it ever came up, but it never has.

Raw chickpeas. The small, black kind. I soak them overnight in cold water, and have them for breakfast along with a shot of espresso.

I got it from my dad. He used to have them with tea.

Mustard bread. I’m dead serious.

Edit to clarify: just a slice of bread with a heap of mustard rushedly spread on it. I either go for honey mustard if I’m looking for a bit of pep, or whole grain Dijon for savouring.

Y’all are horrifying. That’s all I came here to say.